Sexy Guesses for Sexiest Man Alive in the Unsexy Year 2023

Publish date: 2024-06-27

People magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive for 2023 will revealed at midnight tonight. For the many moms and gay men who each year await this announcement with bated breath (only to be disappointed when it’s … Blake Shelton?), this is basically the Super Bowl. Typically, the Sexiest Man is an objectively attractive man over 30, someone with mass appeal, and a person whose career warrants special attention — whether that means starring in Marvel movies, being a judge on The Voice, or being a different judge on The Voice. Before the official announcement, Vulture decided to get in on the fun and play a bit of a guessing game. Who will it be? Well, if you ask us …

Guess who... 🤫 #SexiestManAlive pic.twitter.com/17v4x5IpSx

— People (@people) November 7, 2023

Actor:
Actor is one of the most common jobs Sexiest Men have. The past three Sexiest Men have been Chris Evans, Paul Rudd, and Michael B. Jordan. All sexy, all actors. In that vein, Ryan Gosling would make the most sense this year, but The Wrap reported that Gosling turned down the offer in 2014 and we’re not sure if anything has changed. So maybe People was entranced by Cillian Murphy’s sad, piercing eyes in Oppenheimer or Austin Butler’s gyrations in Elvis. Given that there was a whole SNL sketch dedicated to grandmas going buck wild for Butler, we’re gonna say, if it’s an actor, it’ll be Butler.

Music:
Though not as often as actors, musicians are certainly sometimes our Sexiest Men, with John Legend, Adam Levine, and Gwen Stefani’s man all winning in recent years. Maybe the Weeknd is aiming to get some sexual credibility back after everybody was repulsed by his rattail on The Idol. Shawn Mendes is probably too young, but the gay readership is certainly down. Morgan Wallen had the biggest year in music but isn’t sexy. Ultimately, given our girl-power top ten on the November 7 “Hot 100,” it just doesn’t feel like the right year for a musician to be our Sexiest Man.

Influencers/Podcasters/YouTubers
Absolutely not. That would alienate the moms. But if it were to happen, we think the chaos would be greatest if People went with Dream, post–face reveal. Still, wouldn’t it be fun if it were both Culturistas?

Sports Star:
An athlete hasn’t been the Sexiest Man since David Beckham in 2015, and that just feels wrong. They work out all the time. This should be (excuse the pun) a layup! The obvious answer is Travis Kelce. He won the Super Bowl; he’s dating Taylor Swift. Duh. But the promo video seems to show off a lankier frame, leading us to make our official athlete guess Lionel Messi. He’s playing for Inter Miami, Bad Bunny loves him, and he has known his wife since they were kids. Those are all hot traits. He’s our top pick.

Sexy Guesses for Sexiest Man Alive in the Unsexy Year 2023

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